also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Randomize