I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
