miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
