Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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