Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
