I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
