I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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