I'm drive I can fine osifer
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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