I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
This is the high leading the old right now
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Also, beer. Big fan.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
