But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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