you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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