we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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