THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Let the clothes fall where they may.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize