Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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