party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Randomize
