you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
