talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
