didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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