would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
