the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
