I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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