: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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