I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
