i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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