Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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