you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
