you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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