i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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