I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
