He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
