Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
