So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
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