you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
