i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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