I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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