you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
