But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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