I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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