the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
