what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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