i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Shame - the story of my life.
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