is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Couch. On fire.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
