just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Randomize
