Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
