I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize