We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
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