There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
