Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
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