a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
