Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
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